OK, so I got my butt up, I put on my fancy new make-up, and I even put on a skirt and pantyhose for church. Now you know you live in the country when you drive down the road and have to stop and help an elderly lady try to get a cow back into its field. I crest a hill and there is this red cow (calf, heifer, I don't know I wasn't looking under it) in the road. Now this is a road that people commonly do 60 to 70 mph on, despite speed limit of 45 or so. I could imagine the cow becoming hamburger on the grill of a speeding car. The old lady has the brain of a very sweet and genteel flea. The cattle dog that she thought would wrangle the cow, only ended up driving it farther and farther down the road. Now I don't know about you, but I couldn't let this old lady by herself, try and get this cow back in the fence. So I, evidentally not being of sound mind, stop and try to help herd this cow. I, being a total city girl have no idea about how to approach a cow. So, I talk to it like it could understand me. I'm telling it how it needs to get back inside the fence, and "No, not that way; you need to go this way." I spent about 15 minutes trying to help this lady, and finally a man came along that knew her and by this time the dog had driven the cow out of sight. I left him helping her, and retrieved my cell phone from her, which I'd given her to call her son to come help. Then arrived about 5 minutes late to church. But I couldn't leave that old lady alone on the road trying to wrangle that cow. I later reflected that with my bandana on my bald head, I probably made the scene look even more odd. So I got a nice work-out first thing this morning, in a most unusual way.
The up-side to all this is that I did get to church. I put on my foam boobs and just went. The feel weird and don't stay put awfully well. Of course these are the training-wheels of boobs. I'm hoping by the time I'm healed and have the special-fitted, heavier than pillow-foam boobs, they'll stay put.
I came home and took a nap, and worked on catching up on my EfM reading for tomorrow. I'm procrastinating on the forms I have to send to SS.
So the question is, are boobs optional depending on if I'm dressing up, or are they something I wear everytime I step outside the door? I never thought boobs were optional, but it appears they are. Foam boobs aren't something I consider super uncomfortable, but they're not something that I can just ignore. It's a learning process. They seem very impractical for yoga, so I didn't wear them there. I have to say, they do seem like something I should wear to work, church, etc., but I don't feel compelled to wear them to the mailbox or grocery shopping. I do feel like I have a more balanced look when I wear them, but since I don't feel attractive in any way or like appearances make a lot of difference (because I feel so repulsive being so fat) maybe being lazy and not wearing them at all shouldn't bother me at all. I'm very ambivilant about it presently. The one good thing the boobie bra does is that it doesn't aggrivate a spot on my back that I presume will feel better soon, but it very, very sensitive now and which is aggrivated by my "flaten and compress" bra. Life was complicated enough before, now I have decisions daily about boobs. I suppose having choices is good. When I had my own girls, I had no choice they were just there. Now I have the choice.....and I'm not sure what it means to me as far as propriety, or convenience, or comfort, or practicality. I just don't know yet. I don't feel embarassed by not having boobs. It bothers me more that I don't have hair. (The last of my eyebrows fell out today.)
Well, I'm done being self-centered for now.
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5 comments:
No idea about the boobs. But ya gotta give up the panty hose. ;) No one wears that anymore. :)
Ann, go with what makes you the most comfortable.I am still old fashion, I still wear panty hose, it makes ME feel better.As far as the hair, I lost some of mine from dying it too much, I wore a rocker bandana and also they make hats with hair sewon around the rim, works well especially in hot weather.Good luck in anything you decide to do . Thoughts and prayers to you, you lovely LADY!!! Marilyn (red)
Joann - What a great story about the cow -- I know since we live on a farm -- it brought about memories. Let me tell you you are one "great - great" lady. You are an inspiration with your determination, your kindness -- and just everything about you. I am very thankful to call you a friend. Sending love and prayers - Carolyn
A good samaritan, and on Sunday on the way to church! Good for you.
As far as your other predicament, now I have this mental picture of you every morning saying - let's see - is this a boob day or a no boob day?
I had a similar experience last fall with an 800 pound hog... only the owner had to be found. Hope your cow was as fun as my hog - we laughed for days!
Regarding the boobs... I think that you have beautifully and wonderfully survived one of the most trying, scary, and usually traumatic experiences that a human can go through. If I were in your shoes, I would proudly go boobless and wear shirts that say "I'm more of a woman without my boobies than you'll ever dream of being with yours!"
You have more than earned the right to do whatever you want in regards to your chest without worrying about what anyone else thinks! If someone else thinks it's strange that you don't have boobies, then that's their problem and they can get over it. If you want boobies, wear them. If not, don't. But please, please don't be concerned with what other people think or how other people will react. Base your decision on your feelings, wants, desires, and expectations!
I'll get off my soapbox for the night...
Many blessings!
Amber
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